I get stuck on why "blame" matters so much to people. I don't see how it's relevant. Whatever the cause of my issues, the only thing that's important is how I can fix things. Unless identifying who or what is to blame identifies the cause, and therefore the solution, it's just a distraction.
It's incredible we live in an age where autonomic is not automatic, and the brain can actually change its shape and form. But forgetting even kids for a moment, most adults right now, most suffering adults, don't know any of this stuff... I have been accused of acting like I'm in a cult when I talk about this stuff...! Lots of mystery still surrounds it and many decades, until there is universal acceptance.
Thanks for this gentle reminder! When I am having a particularly difficult day with my chronic illnesses, I tend to blame myself for being ill (even though I know that's logically incorrect) because it gives me the illusion of some measure of control over something in my life. When in fact, the more valuable control I have is that somatic environment (I can consciously relax/distract myself by putting on music or ASMR, by touching something soft or taking a soothing shower, etc.)
Thanks Gary for this bit of your story. In my own experience, it was certainly helpful to understand that the state of my NS scripted my life in good amount. And that there may be a tendency to repeat unsafe scenarios so the NS keeps its job, so there is in one direction, developmental/familial dysregulation -trauma and then secondary or complex trauma because if the system is wonky already, it probably won’t just right itself without intervention.
Maybe I will write about a kid I worked with using SSP. (Note: I have no idea how I became a writer here, but maybe the name, which is kinda cool, might help me get started)!!
I am so curious how this body of work is helping you.
Wonderful article! I so relate to what you wrote. I see it as being "programmed" starting early, and repetitively through various means. Life experiences, modeling, reinforcement from various sources, yet some may have been more valued than others during our lives, for survival's sake or feeling of belonging. So our ANS responds accordingly. I've had physical manifestations myself that I can see being a result of such accumulations. I wish I could have recognized ahead of time where they were headed. Too young early on though, when much damage was being done. So important to be aware of this and to use care.
Brilliant article Gary. We live in survival mode stuck in flight, fight or in the end as the brain and body can't take it anymore.... Freeze response and shut down. It is an automatic response to the fear yet if we are aware of this we can help ourselves through vagus nerve exercises, breathing, mindfulness meditation, yoga..... All things that will bring us back into Parasympathetic mode. When we are continually in the fear response our bodies physiologically change and we are on the road to illness. This stuff should be taught in schools as I think it would prevent a lot of diseases as stress is the no. 1 cause of all disease
I get stuck on why "blame" matters so much to people. I don't see how it's relevant. Whatever the cause of my issues, the only thing that's important is how I can fix things. Unless identifying who or what is to blame identifies the cause, and therefore the solution, it's just a distraction.
It's incredible we live in an age where autonomic is not automatic, and the brain can actually change its shape and form. But forgetting even kids for a moment, most adults right now, most suffering adults, don't know any of this stuff... I have been accused of acting like I'm in a cult when I talk about this stuff...! Lots of mystery still surrounds it and many decades, until there is universal acceptance.
Thanks for this gentle reminder! When I am having a particularly difficult day with my chronic illnesses, I tend to blame myself for being ill (even though I know that's logically incorrect) because it gives me the illusion of some measure of control over something in my life. When in fact, the more valuable control I have is that somatic environment (I can consciously relax/distract myself by putting on music or ASMR, by touching something soft or taking a soothing shower, etc.)
Thanks Gary for this bit of your story. In my own experience, it was certainly helpful to understand that the state of my NS scripted my life in good amount. And that there may be a tendency to repeat unsafe scenarios so the NS keeps its job, so there is in one direction, developmental/familial dysregulation -trauma and then secondary or complex trauma because if the system is wonky already, it probably won’t just right itself without intervention.
Maybe I will write about a kid I worked with using SSP. (Note: I have no idea how I became a writer here, but maybe the name, which is kinda cool, might help me get started)!!
I am so curious how this body of work is helping you.
Wonderful article! I so relate to what you wrote. I see it as being "programmed" starting early, and repetitively through various means. Life experiences, modeling, reinforcement from various sources, yet some may have been more valued than others during our lives, for survival's sake or feeling of belonging. So our ANS responds accordingly. I've had physical manifestations myself that I can see being a result of such accumulations. I wish I could have recognized ahead of time where they were headed. Too young early on though, when much damage was being done. So important to be aware of this and to use care.
Brilliant article Gary. We live in survival mode stuck in flight, fight or in the end as the brain and body can't take it anymore.... Freeze response and shut down. It is an automatic response to the fear yet if we are aware of this we can help ourselves through vagus nerve exercises, breathing, mindfulness meditation, yoga..... All things that will bring us back into Parasympathetic mode. When we are continually in the fear response our bodies physiologically change and we are on the road to illness. This stuff should be taught in schools as I think it would prevent a lot of diseases as stress is the no. 1 cause of all disease